I’m sick of all this!

I haven’t written in a week because I don’t really know what to say that won’t just be adding to all the noise. People at my old church are still being extremely immature over the whole church politics blow-up. (For the record, I don’t look at it as I left that church. That church chose to leave me.) I’m at a point in my spirituality where I can’t be in a church without having a panic attack, for a number of reasons. People are still biting each other’s heads off over the whole Hobby Lobby thing. The U.S. is having a humanitarian aid crisis as unaccompanied minors are fleeing their native countries in droves. Things are getting crazy over in Israel, to put it mildly.

I have strong opinions about all these issues, as well as a lot of honest questions, and I feel like that’s not allowed because it’s not the easy way out of this. But the thing is, there is no “out”. I live in the U.S., so there is no escaping any ramifications of the Hobby Lobby case or the myriad of complex issues surrounding the immigration/humanitarian crisis. I know people who are in Israel right now, experiencing all that horror firsthand. Right now, my heart feels like it’s not going to survive any of this.

I don’t have a strong point or some kind of miraculous conclusion about all this other than I am very sad and angry and I’m sick of trying to keep it inside. Anyone who’s played a role in other people keeping this kind of stuff inside should be ashamed of themselves.


2 thoughts on “I’m sick of all this!

  1. It sounds like you need friends that are supportive, sorry to hear that your former church isn’t (maybe some people but not the overall community) Spiritual communities should be a place you go to feel accepted and supported. And a healthy one allows for questioning.

  2. Unfortunately, it’s pretty common in Christian circles, as I’m finding out. The first church I ever went to was an extremely safe place to ask questions, but the churches I went to after that weren’t, to put it nicely. This is why many people leave Christianity for belief systems like universalism. I wouldn’t make that decision, because there’s enough about it that I don’t agree with, but I understand why people are leaving churches and going that route.

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